Pancake Zac

The hot summer days seemed to be evaporating before my eyes. There was change in the air. Autumn was nearly here. My favorite way to spend the evenings was to doze in a rocking chair. Back and forth I'd rock, remembering the good ol'days when Apple Beer cost only a nickel. The sound of two boys wrestling around in the dirt waffled through the air, breaking my sweet remembrance,
"CHEATER!" yelled one.
"AM NOT!" yelled the other.
Around and around they rolled, punching, clawing, biting, spitting, doing anything young boys could think of.
"HOLD UP THERE", I roared.
Neither one payed notice. Trying again I said, "Stop this bickering boys".
They continued rolling around like wild animals.
"Hey I'll give you both five dollars if you stop", I said.
Their scuffle paused momentarily.
"Really?" they asked in unison.
"No, I just wanted to see if you could hear me", I replied.
They began fighting again. Realizing that they weren't listening to words, I decided to try a different tactic. Lifting my old body out of my rocker I reached over and grabbed my cane. I used it to hobble over to the occupied boys. When I got close enough I began whacking. "Take that, and that, and this," I said as I smacked them with my cane.
"Ouch!" Said one.
"Ouch!" Said the other.
"Stop!" they said together.
I just kept whacking away.
"Why, OUCH! Why are you, OUCH! doing this, OUCH! too us?" asked one of the boys.
"Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me", I replied with a chuckle.
"What?" Screamed the other boy.
"My words didn't work so I figured I'd use sticks and stones. Hopefully my stick works, if it doesn't I'm going to start using stones", I cackled.
"We'll stop!" they yelled,"please just don't hit us with your cane any more!"
"Alright", I said, as I whacked them again for good measure.
I stood eyeing them as they caught their breath. Both boys looked to be about 11 years old. They were covered in so much dirt you could hardly tell they were humans.
"So what type of argument could make creatures like yourselves roll around in the dirt?" I asked.
"He called me a cheat!" one said, pointing to the other.
"He is a cheat!" Said the other, pointing to the one.
Before they could begin fighting again I whacked them on their heads.
"OUCH!" They yelped.
"Well did you cheat?" I asked the boy with that label.
"Just a little bit!" he replied.
"How about you?" I asked, pointing at the other. "Did you cheat too?"
"Not as much as he did", he replied.
"Hmmm, so you both cheated? but neither of you wants to be called a cheater? Is that correct?", I asked.
"Yes sir", they replied.
Trying not to smile at their serious response I said, "Why don't both of you climb up onto my porch here, and I'll give you an apple beer and tell you a story about cheaters".
Realizing there was no way out of listening to an old timer like myself, they answered, "yes sir". I knew they didn't really want to listen, but it gave me someone to talk to, so I ushered them onto my creaky old porch and gave them a cold apple beer.

Many, many years ago there was a young man. His name was Zachary, but most people just called him Pancake, or Pancake Zac. You see, ever since Pancake could remember, pancakes were his specialty. He could make blueberry, craisinberry, chocolate, whole wheat, half wheat, no wheat, sweet, not sweet, or just plain'ol pancakes. You name it and he could make it with a pancake. For miles around everybody knew Pancake could make the best darn pancakes there ever were. Well one day Pancake found himself in a game of Texas Hold'em. Boy oh boy was it a game to remember. This game had begun in a tournament of cards. Everybody and their dogs had started, but now there were only four people left. Wiley Cry, a Native American brave, Susie Mcdougal the local inn keeper, Smelly Tom the barber, and Pancake himself. Oh and also Smart Henries dog. (I said four people, Henries dog was still in). Needless to say, everyone of those people (and the dog) were incredibly handy when it came to card playing. There were bluffs, calling bluffs, Straights, full houses, Royal Straights, you name it they played it. The game went on and on, nobody gaining ground on the other competitors. The night came and went, morning arrived, then left, then the day passed on by, Still they played, and played and played. Nobody was going to give in. Well Pancake being an intelligent young man, knew he could only take so much more. So he hatched a plan, so devious and sly he couldn't believe Wiley handn't thought of it before him. Yet again the night went by and morning arrived.
"Hey there Susie", Pancaked said. "If you give in now I'll make you pancakes for a month". And he really would, he kind of liked Susie, she was an awefully nice critter for those parts.
Susie gave Pancake one of the sweetest smiles he had ever seen and replied, "Those darn pancakes you concoct aren't worth the tail of a door mouse". Everyone nearby gasped. Nobody had ever passed up Pancake's pancakes.
"Dang Susie you must never have had my Royal raspberry pancakes before!" Pancake replied in mock surprise. "I like to go pick some fresh raspberries, then I sprinkle them into the batter. After I fry them up I sprinkle a little bit of powdered sugar on top. OH! I almost forgot, after the light sprinkle of powdered sugar I add some of my mama's special buttermilk syrup. Hmmm it's making my mouth water just thinking of it."
"This is no card game, this is torture! Pancake if you make me half a dozen of those special Raspberry pancakes I'll quit now!" Wiley yelled as he stuck out his hand for Pancake to shake.
"Deal", Pancake yelled back, grabbing Wiley's hand before he could take it back.
Because of Pancakes cunning there were now only four participants left, Pancake of course, Susie Mcdougal, Smart Henries dog, and Smelly Tom.

-------To be continued---------