Bestowal of the Relational Decimal System

Recently I've been stuck in a quandary. In the last few weeks I have been asked how many girlfriends I have had throughout my life. The quandary comes from people not understanding my response. For example, at one point I have said 1.5 girlfriends. I say this because I've created a system that figures out precisely how many girlfriends/boyfriends an individual has had or currently has.

If there is physical contact such as hand holding, kissing etc. more than once without commitment, 0.5
If you have physical contact with emotional and verbal understandings, 1.0.
If there is an excess of over two hundred jokes about you hooking up, 0.25.
If they hold your hand once it depends on the type of hold*
-caress, 0.03
-interlocked, 0.02
-cupped, 0.01
If it is one kiss it depends on the type of kiss and how well you know the person.
-close friend make out session, 0.35
-close friend passionate kiss, 0.25
-close friend peck, 0.14
-acquaintance make out session, 0.20
-acquaintance passionate kiss, 0.16
-acquaintance peck, 0.10
-unknown victim make out session, 0.10
-unknown victim passionate kiss, 0.15
-unknown victim peck, 0.05
If you wink it depends on the individuals response*
-if they wink back, 0.01
-if they wink back and lick their lips, 0.02
- if they purr back, 0.10
If you put your arm around an individual it depends on their response*
-if they shudder and elbow you in the gut, -0.05
-if they tell you no, 0.0
-if they let you rest it on them, 0.05

In the future I will continue to answer the above stated question using my system. I'd appreciate it if people would know what I mean when I say 1.5 etc. Thank you and have a good day.

*(these actions could count as relational jokes which corresponds and counts toward a girlfriend/boyfriend)